Well...

Good weekend. Me and the brothers together for the first time since my little man came around. An under fabulous circumstances.

An I mean that sarcastically.

I am tired. I can not even explain.

I have been watching this documentary on New York. I never knew that Ellis Island was so competitive.

My life story.

Today I waited all day for a sixteen year old girl to come to my job so that I could bring her to a new home. This is a girl who has been pulled from her mothers care and entered foster care four times with in the last nine year and she is fed up. She tells me later that she does even care about going back to her mother any more because her mother will just find some other man and she will end up back in foster care. She also told me that she is writing her life story and she is almost done with second chapter. Wow! I told her to keep writing. This little girl has experienced so much that my life is a novel seems like a false notion.
I have been reading the books by Augusten Burroughs. He has written a few memoir style novels. They are of such outlandish bizzare quality people start to wonder how true they are. Especially now that one of his novels is a hollywood movie. The first text says 'Based on a true story' But then my question is aren't we alllowed to report our lifes story how, when and which way we want? I is our story. We own it. We should be be able to to report it how we want as ong as it is our story. Any event that happens to us is often different in the telling. It is a natural tendancy. But what about that dude who had to apologize to Oprah? NO idea what his name is. How is this related?

explosion

I guess I am having trouble with this blog thing. How did it go so well for a while then fizzle out. And how can I make it readible? A certain someone responds to my stories with a constant statement 'write it in your blog! Write it in your blog!' But the problem I find is I don't find anthing worth writing about. However I find a lot worth talking about. But this certain person told me recently that I 'live my like a novel' or should it be rather I 'am writing a novel'. What does that mean? I even asked him 'what does that mean? Does it mean i express my creativity in my choices. Do my choices maximize the drama?' I have experienced conflict but I really feel that a lot of it was not my choice. But some of it was my choice. I don't know. One day it will all come out in 14 days. I will write my memoirs in 14 days. That is the plan. Next time I will I will talk about memoirs.

The 'explosion' in the title referrs to what has happened to me 24 hours ago. Someone who I have invested immense amounts of money, time and emotion in has betrayed me to the core. This money time and emotion has always been an investment because I felt I woul get it back ten fold. Though this person has betrayed me they still pledge eternal loyalty to me. Though their version of loyalty is different from mine. How can all this be? What should I do? Do you all want ot hear more?

'Explosion' also referrs to the beginning of my biggest blog era ever.